Showing posts with label Halo. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Halo. Show all posts

Tuesday, November 27, 2012

The harder you push it on me, the more I'm going to resist.

Halo is a lot like anal sex, if you're forced to do it as a kid, you wont really enjoy it much as an adult. Ok that's a re-purposed  lima bean joke, but you get my point.

Last time I played Halo, it was the first one, on the first XBOX. I thought it was neat but I had better games to play and didn't think much of it. Halo 2 came out, and I don't think I ever tried it. I heard good things and the game looked really neat, but for some reason I never picked it up. Just not my cup of tea I guess.

Halo 3 came out, again heard good things, even bought a used copy but never actually put it in and played it. I almost went and got another used copy, but then it hit me. I don't think I really want to play the game. Fanboi elitism is probably the worst on that game, so I cant blame microsoft entirely for that.  It feels like every time I go into gamestop/ebgames whatever you want to call them, they try to sell me a Halo game. I mean I went in there to pick up need for speed and its like "oh you like racing games? try Halo for a change of pace", I go in to get Saints Row 3 and I hear "Well if you like shooting stuff, try Halo", I even picked up a 3DS for Bonnie and I got "Im guessing this pink 3DS is for your girl, why don't you pick up Halo so you have something to play while she's on her 3DS?" Maybe I like pink, homophobe. Sides, everyone knows handhelds are just replacements for newspapers and magazines in the bathroom. EVERYBODY POOPS!

So now, I go into the gamestop in the mall and I pick up AC3 and they pitch me Halo 4, I just can't get away from them trying to sell it to me. I went back and picked up my Hitman Absolution but I beat them to the punch this time. I walk up and say "Man can you believe people buy that shitty Halo game? All I got was confused stares and my fucking game. So yeah I don't hate Halo, but I don't like or care about it either. You have your Master Chief and Cortana I have Agent 47 and Diana Burnwood.

Time to go kill shit and not have a neon orange glowing sniper rifle to do it either.

~Malenko